A New Year

So...last year was CRAZY! I had to deal with a lot of stuff I wasn't expecting...and I don't think I really handled everything all that well. And it's my fault - no one else's.

I didn't turn my back on God, really. I love Him a lot and want to follow His plan for my life. But I really struggled this past year with letting go of MY hopes and dreams and just trusting the fact He has good plans for me. I was so impatient. I thought God was taking too long so I tried to make things happen on my own. And of course, all my efforts only screwed my life up even more and caused me more pain yet again.

So this year, I am determined that things are going to change. They have to, because I can't keep living like this. I'm tired of being miserable and having to hold it together and act like everything is great when I just want to scream that it's not.

I dealt with some really tough times last year, and didn't really have a person that I could lean on. I mean, I have some really awesome friends and I love them a lot! But there are some very personal things that I'm not entirely comfortable sharing with even them!

So after thinking about all the mess that was the year 2010, I have decided that I am not going back down! I'm going after God this year and believing that it will be the BEST YEAR YET!